Your clients have no business knowing your costs.
If you never say “no,” what is your “yes” actually worth?
Never spare a thought for the opinions of people you’d never ask for advice.
Alright, so some of my advice comes off as combative.
As a consequence, I often get asked whether such attitudes are counterproductive.
Isn’t some of this just the cost of being a “collaborative” service provider?
Well, yes… but actually no.
Sure, letting some things slide sometimes is the cost of not coming off as a clown.
But being collaborative does not mean we should shield the client from all headaches.
Our job is to protect them from unnecessary headaches—that’s a big difference.
We should be expected to transform something, and transformation is always a major headache. But it’s worth it.
Otherwise, you cause a hidden cost: when you confuse “supportive” with “soft,” you erode the very tension your expertise exists to hold. They didn’t hire you to keep things smooth—they hired you to make change survivable.
Like any worthwhile communication, real collaboration isn’t frictionless.
To be effective, it requires designed, structured friction with a point.
Push when it counts. Decline what distracts. Say the true thing early.
Try this: Review one recent decision you quietly let slide. If you had said the thing that needed saying, what would’ve changed?